{"id":1133,"date":"2017-11-26T20:52:29","date_gmt":"2017-11-26T20:52:29","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/megaga.dk\/?p=1133"},"modified":"2017-11-26T20:52:29","modified_gmt":"2017-11-26T20:52:29","slug":"corleones-cleaning-company-corleones-rengoringsskelskab-haibun-play","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/?p=1133","title":{"rendered":"Corleone’s Cleaning Company \/ Corleones Reng\u00f8ringsskelskab – haibun play"},"content":{"rendered":"
\n

Corleone\u2019s Cleaning Company<\/strong>
\n(or: some things just have to be said three times)<\/em><\/p>\n

Piet: Bakelite, satellite, Marmite. Bakelite, satellite, Marmite. Bakelite, satellite, Marmite \u2026
\nFlemming: Why are you saying Bakelite, satellite, Marmite?
\nPiet: I don\u2019t know. Perhaps my mouth just felt like it. It\u2019s restless.
\nFlemming: Your mouth is restless? Thought it might be tired after all the chew-up.
\nPiet: Naw, it\u2019s still not satisfied. Restless, restless, restlesssss.
\nFlemming: Stop it. You sound like Gollum.
\nPiet: It\u2019s not me, it\u2019s my mouth.
\nFlemming: What\u2019s the difference?
\nPiet: Just listen to the words \u201cmy mouth\u201d. Says it all. I have a mouth, but I am not my mouth.
\nFlemming: Ah, that Buddhist clap-trap. Think it will make you less guilty?
\nPiet: It doesn\u2019t take away its urges, though. Bite, bite, bite!
\nFlemming: What could it possibly want more? You chew up half the sofa, the little table, grandmother\u2019s old lamp and the Kelim in the dining room.
\nPiet: Who\u2019s Kelim?
\nFlemming: Not a person, a rug, a carpet.
\nPiet: Ah, that. Didn\u2019t taste good. How long since it\u2019s been vacuumed?
\nFlemming: Since you chewed up the maid.
\nPiet: We had a maid?
\nFlemming: Yes.
\nPiet: What did she taste like?
\nFlemming: How would I know? It\u2019s you who ate her.
\nPiet: I didn\u2019t eat her. My mouth did. And anyway, it just chewed her up and spit her out. Didn\u2019t eat her. Didn\u2019t eat her. Didn\u2019t eat her.
\nFlemming: Yea, I know. I was the one who had to fix that.
\nPiet: (Sarcastic): Ah, that was hard, was it? You had to actually phone the cleaners. So hard on the fingers, so hard to deal with ordinary people. Poor you.
\nFlemming: They were no ordinary people. They were employees of the Corleone\u2019s Cleaning Company. Very top notch. The best of the best.
\nPiet: They tasted like any other cleaner to me. Especially the old one.
\nFlemming: Ah yes, now you mention it. We have to move. We can\u2019t stay here.
\nPiet: Why not?
\nFlemming: You know that the two young cleaners got away, don\u2019t you?
\nPiet: Yes, so what?
\nFlemming: They told Old Don C. the whole thing and now they\u2019re coming to get us.
\nPiet: What could they possibly do?
\nFlemming: Helloooo!!! Earth calling Piet! Corleone. Cor-le-one! (Starts whistling and humming and da-da-da-ing the tune from Godfather (I, II and III)).
\nPiet: Ah, him. Them. So they\u2019ll come around with cotton balls in their cheeks. So what?
\nFlemming: (Hitting his forehead repeatedly with his own fist). You just don\u2019t get it, do you? We\u2019re fish food, if we stay here.
\nPiet: Yes! That\u2019s it! It\u2019s fish it\u2019s after!
\nFlemming: What?
\nPiet: I wanna bite into some fish. Or rather, my mouth wants to. (In a low voice:) I have a mouth, I am not my mouth. I have a mouth, I am not my mouth. I have a mouth, I am not my mouth.<\/p>\n

death by polka
\nnow, that should wipe the smile
\noff Poirot\u2019s face<\/p>\n

\u2026<\/p>\n

Corleones Reng\u00f8ringsselskab<\/strong>
\n(eller: nogle ting skal siges tre gange)<\/em><\/p>\n

Piet: Bakelit, satellit, habit. Bakelit, satellit, habit. Bakelit, satellit, habit \u2026
\nFlemming: Hvorfor siger du bakelit, satellit, habit?
\nPiet: Aner det ikke. M\u00e5ske fordi min mund bare har lyst til det. Den er rastl\u00f8s.
\nFlemming: Er din mund rastl\u00f8s? Jeg troede, den ville v\u00e6re tr\u00e6t efter al den tyggen i stykker.
\nPiet: N\u00e6eh, den er stadig ikke tilfreds. Rastl\u00f8s, rastl\u00f8s, rastl\u00f8sssssss.
\nFlemming: Stop det. Du lyder som Gollum.
\nPiet: Det\u2019 ikke mig, det\u2019 min mund.
\nFlemming: Hvad er forskellen?
\nPiet: Bare lyt til ordene \u201cmin mund\u201d. De siger det hele. Jeg har en mund, jeg er ikke min mund.
\nFlemming: Aj, det buddhistiske sludder. Tror du, det vil g\u00f8re dig mindre skyldig?
\nPiet: Det fjerner i hvert fald ikke dens trang. Bide, bide, bide!
\nFlemming: Hvad mere ku\u2019 den \u00f8nske sig? Du har bidt halvdelen af sofaen i stykker, sofabordet, mormors gamle lampe og den nye Kelim i spisestuen.
\nPiet: Hvem er Kelim?
\nFlemming: Ikke en person, et t\u00e6ppe, et gulvt\u00e6ppe.
\nPiet: Ah, d\u00e9t. Smagte ikke godt. Hvor l\u00e6nge siden er det, det blev st\u00f8vsuget?
\nFlemming: Ikke siden du bed stuepigen i stykker.
\nPiet: Har vi haft en stuepige?
\nFlemming: Ja.
\nPiet: Hvordan smagte hun?
\nFlemming: Hvordan sku\u2019 jeg ku\u2019 vide det? Det var dig, der spiste hende.
\nPiet: Jeg spiste hende ikke. Min mund gjorde, og den bed hende kun i stykker og spyttede hende ud igen. Spiste hende ikke. Spiste hende ikke. Spiste hende ikke.
\nFlemming: Jo tak det v\u00e9d jeg. Det var mig, der sku\u2019 ordne det bagefter.
\nPiet: (Sarkastisk): \u00c5h, det var vel nok h\u00e5rdt, hva\u2019? Du skulle selv ringe efter reng\u00f8ringshj\u00e6lpen. S\u00e5 h\u00e5rdt for fingrene, s\u00e5 besv\u00e6rligt at skulle forholde sig til almindelige mennesker. Stakkels dig.
\nFlemming: Det var sgu\u2019 ikke almindelige mennesker. De var fra Corleones Reng\u00f8ringsselskab. Topklasse. De bedste af de bedste.
\nPiet: De smagte som almindelige reng\u00f8ringsfolk, synes jeg. Specielt den gamle.
\nFlemming: \u00c5h, nu du si\u2019r det. Vi bliver n\u00f8dt til at flytte. Vi kan ikke blive boende her.
\nPiet: Hvorfor ikke?
\nFlemming: Du v\u00e9d, at de to unge reng\u00f8ringsfolk slap v\u00e6k, ikke?
\nPiet: Jo, og hvad s\u00e5?
\nFlemming: De fortalte Gamle Don C. det hele, og nu kommer de efter os.
\nPiet: Hvad skulle de kunne g\u00f8re os?
\nFlemming: Hallooo! Jorden kalder Piet! Corleone, Cor-le-one! (Begynder at fl\u00f8jte, nynne, da-da-da\u2019e melodien fra Godfather (I, II og III)).
\nPiet: N\u00e5eh, ham. Dem. S\u00e5 de vil bare komme her med vatkugler i kinderne. Og hvad s\u00e5?
\nFlemming: (Sl\u00e5r sig gentagne gange p\u00e5 panden med sin knyttede h\u00e5nd) Du fatter det bare ikke, hva\u2019? Vi bli\u2019r til fiskef\u00f8de, hvis vi bliver her.
\nPiet: Yes! Der var det! Det er fisk, den er ude efter!
\nFlemming: Hva\u2019?
\nPiet: Jeg vil bide i nogle fisk. Eller rettere, min mund vil. (I lav stemmeleje): Jeg har en mund, jeg er ikke min mund. Jeg har en mund, jeg er ikke min mund. Jeg har en mund, jeg er ikke min mund.<\/p>\n

d\u00f8d ved polka
\ns\u00e5, d\u00e9t vil t\u00f8rre smilet
\naf Poirots fj\u00e6s<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Corleone\u2019s Cleaning Company (or: some things just have to be said three times) Piet: Bakelite, satellite, Marmite. Bakelite, satellite, Marmite. Bakelite, satellite, Marmite \u2026 Flemming: Why are you saying Bakelite, satellite, Marmite? Piet: I don\u2019t know. Perhaps my mouth just felt like it. It\u2019s restless. Flemming: Your mouth is restless? Thought it might be tired […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,59],"tags":[10,74],"class_list":["post-1133","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-haibun","category-haibun-play","tag-haibun","tag-haibun-play"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1133","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1133"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1133\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1135,"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1133\/revisions\/1135"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1133"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1133"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/megaga.dk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1133"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}